


Fuck Being Cool

by Grinning_Sunflower



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Sharing an umbrella, pure fluff, star projector show
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-23 00:19:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7459237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grinning_Sunflower/pseuds/Grinning_Sunflower
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He's supposed to be cool, even if his chest undergoes cardiac arrest every time Yamaguchi does endearing shit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fuck Being Cool

The phantom slaps of a volleyball are etched into Tsukishima's palms after practice.

As they depart from the team, with steamy meat buns already consumed, the afternoon sunlight paints Yamaguchi in melted gold, shedding spotlight on the cinnamon freckles dusting his face. His eyes, warm and brown like hot cocoa reserved for a winter evening, are sharp with focus — focus on the stream of words that spew forth from smiling lips. He's reliving the past, reflecting back on a light-hearted anecdote from their childhood.

Tsukishima listens, even though he's heard this story twice by now. Even if the story is only meant to serve as idle chatter to occupy the atmosphere, he always opens his ears. He drinks up whatever Yamaguchi has to say, tunes in to the alluring lilt in his voice, the curve in every pronunciation, every syllable, every vowel.

"The weather report says there's a chance for rain tomorrow," Yamaguchi mentions, moments after their entrance inside the Tsukishima household. Tsukishima's mother is out shopping for groceries and Akiteru only visits on weekends because of college, so no one is here to greet them. "Don't forget your umbrella."

They exchange mild chatter while settling in a study routine. Exams are approaching in a few weeks. Pencil scribbles tango with papers. For a while, silence dominates.

They're next to each other. So close yet so far. Whenever Tsukishima's writing, his elbow will graze Yamaguchi's. Their knees might touch and their shoulders might brush up against one another. It's minor contact that's barely there, limited only to whenever he has to jot something down or readjust his sitting position, but it still sends tingles of warmth. He feeds off of these sparse touches, so much so that it's stupid.

When they’re done, Yamaguchi makes his leave early for dinner. He picks his presence up and out the door before bidding farewell. Once Tsukishima is back in his room, alone with his dinosaur figures, a sigh escapes him.

 _Shit_.

He has it bad. _So_ bad.

Even though it had probably started long before that, Tsukishima began to acknowledge his feelings after the Tokyo training camp, after Yamaguchi had dared to raise his voice for the first time, after he had locked eyes with Tsukishima and set him straight.

Harboring these icky feelings for Yamaguchi, feelings that can scramble Tsukishima's insides upside down over every little thing he does, is like taking a stab to the gut every day. He doesn’t need these type of feelings for the relationship they have now, doesn’t need all of this useless angst.

Tsukishima pinches the bridge of his nose, pushing his glasses up. So far, he's managing well; he's managed to forge composure without coming off as suspicious. He's supposed to be cool, even if his chest undergoes cardiac arrest every time Yamaguchi does endearing shit.

His crush, his unnecessary pain-in-the-ass crush, is classified information and he'll force it to remain that way.

~ ~ ~

Tsukishima awakens to a pity storm. The rain clouds weep like a woman who's broken up with her long-term spouse. Every rumble of thunder is the equivalent to one of her frustrated wails. A waterfall of tears piles in abundance, dampening the world in ice-cold heartache.

Today could be the perfect day to host a funeral.

Yamaguchi lives across the street from him. When they meet up on their usual route to school, Tsukishima discovers his friend drenched to the bone.

His uniform is soaked. His dark hair, even the stray piece that's always protruding from his head, is flattened by the downpour. He brings his hands together in a clap. "Sorry, Tsukki!" he half-shouts over the roar of the rain. "Could we share?"

Tsukishima shields him with his umbrella — their umbrella now.

Yamaguchi flashes a smile, a quick twist of his lips, before matching his pace. While they’re confined together in a limited space, the distance between them is measured by close-cut centimeters. Sloppy steps slosh in gray-brown puddles, marking ripples in the pavement.

Tsukishima is aware of their tight proximity. Too aware. His grip on the umbrella handle tightens. "Why didn't you bring your own umbrella?"

"I lost it." Yamaguchi threads his fingers through his hair, smothering out clingy raindrops. "You think my hair will grow out long enough to be tied in a ponytail? I think it might in a couple of months or so."

"Hm," Tsukishima hums, a note of assent. Yamaguchi can probably rock a ponytail, but he doesn't express that aloud.

"I'm looking forward to the party tonight."

It's a get-together party for the entire gang, hosted at Daichi's place (even though it was Suga's idea). The party idea was proposed to strengthen team bonds or whatever.

Tsukishima wrinkles his nose in mock disdain. "We're already close enough as a team, we don't need more bonding."

Yamaguchi snickers. "But you're still going to go anyway."

That he is.

~ ~ ~

Hours after practice, by the time the get-together party crashes to a halt, Hinata has spiked countless pillows, Kageyama is out of pillows to hurl, Nishinoya is high on fruit punch and is belting his lungs out with his brother from another mother Tanaka (who is also sugar high), Kiyoko had already left a while ago, Yachi is overwhelmed by the pillows fest, Suga is laughing like a maniac that's won a fat jackpot, Daichi is done, and Asahi's soul has been lifted into the heavens.

Terrific.

"What savages," Tsukishima remarks, once he and Yamaguchi had swapped their good-byes with the team. One hand is stashed in his pocket, the other holds the umbrella they must share once more. A drizzle of rain tap dances on their umbrella's hardcover.

It's late. Tomorrow is Sunday and the idea of sleeping in tempts him.

"That was crazier than I expected. Well, not that I had many expectations to begin with." Yamaguchi's shoulder touches his and stays there. His presence radiates warmth. It's casual contact that holds platonic value, Tsukishima reminds himself. Nothing else. "Are you free tomorrow?"

"Maybe. Why?"

"I stumbled upon this new café the other day. They have great strawberry shortcake—“

"You don't have to bribe me to go."

Yamaguchi beams, his face glowing like the stars in the sky. "Okay, Tsukki."

Being cool is proving to be difficult right now.

Yamaguchi's gaze lingers on Tsukishima. Tsukishima doesn't have to look to know, he can feel those eyes burning into him like laser beams.

Tsukishima arches a brow up. "You have something else to say?"

"Since you're going to be hanging out me with anyway, why don't you stay over at my place tonight?"

As long-term friends, they stay over at each other's places almost all the time. Tsukishima doesn't have a reason to reject the offer, even though he knows that being near Yamaguchi any longer will only test his endurance.

"Sure," comes his response, bland and nonchalant, the complete opposite of his galloping heartbeats.

And with that, it's settled.

~ ~ ~

"Tsukki, I have something to show you."

Yamaguchi advances ahead, leading the way with excited strides. Tsukishima follows behind him. When they reach the living room, a star projector awaits, sitting on wooden floorboards. For a second, the sight of it catches Tsukishima's breath.

"I ordered it online." Yamaguchi beams. "What do you think? Wanna give it a try?"

"Do it."

The lights are killed with a switch. Darkness drapes over them, flooding the room with inky tides. Tsukishima hears some shuffling, and then it happens.

Stars are launched everywhere, tracing the walls and furniture with a map of hot-white constellations. The entire galaxy swallows them whole, hurling them out of this world. Tsukishima and Yamaguchi are astronauts, explorers floating in the infinite frontier of space.

"Wow," Yamaguchi exhales. He turns to Tsukishima, his freckled face and warm eyes bathed in starlight. "Stunning, isn't it?"

 _You're stunning_ , Tsukishima almost blurts, that lovesick side of him eager to conquer. Instead, he nods, a choked-up "yes" coughing out from him.

Being cool is extremely difficult right now.

They indulge in the moment, basking in the beauty of the cosmos.

~ ~ ~

After bloating it up to maximum capacity, Yamaguchi rearranges the spare air mattress next to his bed. He tosses a few quilts over it. "Here, Tsukki."

Tsukishima nods. As he pushes his glasses up, his eyes flicker over to the umbrella leaning near the doorway.

"What is it?" Yamaguchi follows his gaze. “What are you looking at?”

"I thought you had lost your umbrella."

"Oh." While scratching the back of his head, a wry chuckle leaves Yamaguchi. "There it is."

"Why did you lie about losing your umbrella?"

"I didn't really lie." The words are stuttered out in the open like a dying car engine. "Well, okay, maybe I did."

Tsukishima's brows pinch together, demanding an explanation.

“This is going to sound weird, but . . .” Yamaguchi stares at the floor, studying it with flustered intensity. "I lied because I wanted to be near you."

"You're always near me."

"I know, but—" He bites down on his lower lip, cutting himself off with a sound gulp. "Never mind."

Tsukishima frowns. Whatever this is can't just be smoothed out with a curt 'never mind'. "Don't let the topic die."

"I don't want to talk about it."

He prods anyway. "You would've gotten a cold if I hadn't brought an umbrella with me to share."

"I didn't only want to be near you. I wanted to be” — for a staggering second, Yamaguchi pauses — "more intimate somehow."

 _Intimate_.

"It's stupid to try something like that with you. I'm stupid." Suddenly, his voice wavers, dented by hurt. "I'm sorry, you're probably weirded out right now. We're guys, we can't really do that kind of stuff."

"Are you trying to confess to me?" The way Tsukishima words the question is blunt and jaded around the edges.

Yamaguchi stiffens, visible discomfort freezing him in place. Then, he nods, a rigid bob of his head.

Fuck being cool.

Tsukishima approaches him, his shadow towering over a startled Yamaguchi. He seizes his shoulders, his fingers digging into the short shirt sleeves, and seals the gap in between them.

The kiss is a feather-light brush against lips, not rough and hungry like expected. When they're torn apart, newfound awe shines in Yamaguchi's starry eyes.

"Tsukki," he gasps, like his lungs are malfunctioning.

Heat erupts in Tsukishima's face, scalding his ears and saturating his cheeks with scarlet. "Is this intimate enough for you?"

Instead of answering, Yamaguchi lunges at him, his arms grappling his back. Tsukishima stumbles, taken off guard by the attack—

And then Yamaguchi's tasting him, devouring him and — _oh shit_ , Tsukishima's knees are actually crumbling.

They're both panting by the end of it.

"Uh, I didn't mean to push you," Yamaguchi sputters, suddenly shy again. "I just—"

"Shut up, Tadashi."

Laughter bubbles from him. "Sorry, Kei."

After that, Tsukishima opts to ditch the air mattress and share a bed with Yamaguchi.

~ ~ ~

A week later, when Yamaguchi pecks Tsukishima on the cheek and tells him he's amazing by the end of practice, Hinata trips, Kageyama drops his volleyball, Nishinoya smacks into Tanaka, Tanaka is crouched in pain, Daichi chokes on his water, Suga laughs so hard that he has a coughing fit because he's known all along, Kiyoko blinks, Yachi is flustered over whether to congratulate them or not, and Asahi's soul has been lifted into the heavens.

Everyone descends into madness.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read. Please don't hesitate to give feedback.


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